10 QUESTIONS WE ANSWERED AS PARENTS-TO-BE!

ago

The crazy speed with which my pregnancy flew by surprised me so much, so after snapping our cheesy baby bump pictures during our babymoon, I thought it'd be fun to do a little Q&A about our expectations as parents-to-be. It seems like a super nice way to mark this once-in-a-lifetime experience (we did a similar one to celebrate our 10-year anniversary!), and I imagine it's going to be awesome to look back on our answers one day and swoon over our naivety. :) And just so you know, we answered the questions separately, to ensure complete and total honesty. :) So if you're curious to find out our biggest anxieties as new parents, the traits we hope our little boy to inherit from one another, or the really annoying things we've forbidden each other to do as new parents, read along...

 

parents-to-be

 

HOW ARE YOU GUYS FEELING?

Sofie: Now that our boy can be here any day now, I'm basically feeling it all! :) From super curious to meet him to slightly anxious about the unknown (mostly giving birth and what impact he'll have on our day-to-day lives), all mixed with a general feeling of total excitement of course! It's kind of an exhausting period in that way, and since I'm physically pretty much done with being pregnant, I'm kind of like: okay, just bring it on. :)

Marcio: I'm obviously experiencing this pregnancy a bit differently than Sofie, because I don't have to deal with all the physical discomforts. From day one, I just felt so lucky & blessed to be able to experience this together, and I can't wait to welcome our little man into the family!

 

WHAT'S THE THING YOU'RE MOSTLY LOOKING FORWARD TO AS A PARENT-TO-BE?

Sofie: I so look forward to getting to know him, you know, as a person. No matter how exciting those first kicks were, up until now it has all been a bit abstract, and I can't wait to experience his personality, the things he likes, and the things that may remind me of Marcio & myself. And this may sound weird, but I'm particularly curious about his smile, what it'll look like and how it'll sound. I bet it's going to make me melt every single time. 

Marcio: I'm mostly looking forward to the new kind of love we'll be experiencing. People always say that, no matter how much you've loved someone in the past, nothing compares to what you feel for your baby. That just sounds super amazing, right? I also honestly can't wait to play soccer with him for the very first time. I know it sounds silly, but I have this vision in my head that it's going to be an awesome moment. :)

 

WHAT'S YOUR BIGGEST ANXIETY RIGHT NOW?

Sofie: Just like most people I do worry about balancing it all out - relationships, baby, job, me-time. I bet it's going to be pretty challenging to juggle it all! Right now, it's still a big question mark what the baby's going to be like, whether he'll be a good sleeper or a cry baby - we just don't know. And since I like to be in control of things, that does scare me a bit. I've always loved my job so much, but since it can be super unpredictable and chaotic, I'm curious to see how the baby and work will co-exist. :) Right now, I just try to let it go as much as possible, but it's definitely something that's on my mind.

Marcio: At this moment, I'm getting pretty anxious about the delivery. It's coming so close, and we're just getting nervous about bringing the baby into this world and what it will feel like to have him around on that first day.

 

WHICH PERSONALITY TRAITS OF ONE ANOTHER WOULD YOU LIKE THE BABY TO INHERIT?

Sofie: That's an easy one! I would love, love, love it if our little man would feel the same unconditional love for his mama as Marcio does. He's just such a gentleman, and he'll do anything for his mama. She's really his no. 1 person, and isn't that just every mama's dream? Further, Marcio's super caring and helpful; even with strangers, he'll go out of his way to help them and make them feel comfortable. I think that's such a sweet trait!

Marcio: I would love for the baby to be as positive as Sofie! She's always full of life, happy, hard working, and with a big heart. If he'll inherit all of that from her, I'll be the luckiest man alive.

 

WHAT KIND OF PARENT DO YOU EXPECT EACH OTHER TO BE?

Sofie: I think Marcio will be a great mix of Brazilian & European, in the sense that he'll definitely give our boy the freedom to do his own thing, but at the same time he'll have to behave and be polite. He's going to be strict about that, I'm sure, and I think that's super great!

Marcio: I'm 100% sure that Sofie's going to be a super loving & caring mama, and that she's going to make sure to pass on everything she's learned from her family to our boy. I love the idea of having a tight family like that!

 

WHETHER IT'S A PARTICULAR NAME, ANNOYING HABIT OR BABY ITEM: WHAT ARE THE THINGS YOU HAVE FORBIDDEN EACH OTHER TO DO AS NEW PARENTS?

Sofie: OMG, I really don't just want to become the mama. :) That's actually something that I'm very conscious about in general; I don't want to lose myself as a person, you know? I don't want one role in my life - whether it's mama, girlfriend or business woman - to dominate others. Additionally, and this is something completely random, I also noticed whenever I'm in Brazil that babies are treated a bit more roughly than here; they just basically throw them around, haha. So I already made Marcio promise me to be super gentle with our baby. I'm sure this is a first-time-mama thing but I really just don't want to break the kid. :)

Marcio: I don't want him to be too fashionable, haha! I always joke to Sofie that she doesn't have to style him, it's okay if he's a bit more nonchalant, like his papa. ;) I want him to run around and get dirty, rather than have a designer kid. :)

 

parents-to-be

 

DO YOU FEEL LIKE YOU'VE ALREADY NOTICED SOME CHANGES IN EACH OTHER EVER SINCE EXPECTING A BABY?

Sofie: Marcio has always been protective, but this has definitely doubled since we're 2. From day one of my pregnancy, he's basically forbidden me to lift things, and he also calls me often to check how I'm doing. What has also kind of surprised me is how ready he is for the baby. I expected him to start getting anxious at some point, but other than trying to become a better version of himself, I haven't seen him freak out about having a baby. For him, it can't go fast enough!

Marcio: She's definitely less of a workaholic now! She's still super focused on work, but she really makes sure to take good care of herself (which used to be more of an afterthought). I'm actually super happy to see that, because I was never able to convince her about that by myself. So already, the baby's good news! :)

 

HOW DO YOU PLAN TO DIVIDE THE PARENTING TASKS?

Sofie: In the beginning, since I plan to do breastfeeding, I suppose Marcio will have to take care of other practical things, such as grocery shopping and cooking (lots of spaghetti ahead! ;)). Further, it's really important for us to not fall into the good cop/bad cop trap, where one parent says 1 thing and the other one just takes it apart. I hope we'll be a team in all that we do, and yes, he'll have to change diapers, haha.  

Marcio: I'm fully planning to compensate her breastfeeding with changing as much diapers as I possibly can! :) I will seriously try to take on all the practicalities that I can, so that she can focus on resting and getting the baby strong and healthy. Once he gets a bit older, I suppose we can divide things up a bit more, but for those first months, I'll go all out.

 

ARE YOU SCARED ABOUT THE CHANGES THAT THE BABY'S GOING TO MEAN FOR YOUR RELATIONSHIP?

Sofie: Not really! We'll be together for 11 years this Summer, so I think it's safe to say we know each other pretty well. Already during my pregnancy I could feel how the baby brought us closer together. It's clearly something that we've created together, and I can't wait to also experience it together. That's something I'm so thankful for, that he's by my side, no matter what.

Marcio: Not at all! I'm completely positive that this baby will only make us stronger as a couple. We still have so many things we'd like to do together, only now we can do it as a family!

 

WHAT'S THE MOST IMPORTANT THING YOU'D LIKE TO PASS ON TO YOUR LITTLE BOY?

Sofie: Apart from focusing on social manners, respect, and positivism, I mostly want our boy to feel like the sky is the limit. This is something that's really close to my heart, and that I try to live by every day: if you don't reach for the stars, you'll never get close to them. I want our baby to feel like he can be or do anything he wants, as long as he's focused and finds happiness in it.

Marcio: I would really like for him to honour his Brazilian roots, learn Portuguese, always think positively, follow his dreams even if life's treating him roughly, and remember that family is the most important thing in the world. Those are all the things that make me happy, and I hope they will do the same for him.

 

What were your expectations as parents-to-be? Did they come true? :) Anything else you'd like to know? We'd love to hear!

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So nice to read this article. Will Marcio speak Portuguese to the baby? Do you feel stressed about raising the baby bilingually and talking several languages at home? Just asking because we are thinking about raising our baby to come in 2 languages as well :-)
Hey Annelies! So happy you liked it! :) Yes, Marcio will speak Portuguese to the baby, my parents & I will probably mostly speak Dutch to him, and Marcio & I will continue to talk in English to each other (and the baby, obviously), so it'll be a great mix, haha. We think it's very important to raise him bilingually so that he can fully be a part of both of our families. I only see it as an advantage for him to be able to learn several languages from a young age on, so I hope it'll turn out great for all of us! Good luck with your little one! xx big kiss
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